Night train from Bangkok to Koh Tao

I picked up Maddie at the airport in Bangkok just after midnight on Tuesday. We shared a taxi to Khao San Road with a super obnoxious American guy from Hollywood who embodied the prime example of what not to be as a traveler; rasta hippie-pants, ginger mohawk, bad tattoos, and really abrasive voice. Shameful. We ditched him after the 40 minute cab ride and had a late dinner and couple of beers at an all-night restaurant on Khao San Rd. After a fitful couple of hours of sleep, we woke up to pack and check out of our hotel and leave our bags for the day while we explored the area. A sudden monsoon downpour trapped us in a salon where we splurged on several beauty treatments. The highlight was an hour long foot massage that doubled as torture/relaxation to my ridiculously ticklish feet. At 6 pm we hopped at taxi to the train station, found our platform, car and bunk and surveyed the situation. I had heard stories about the classy accommodations of Thai trains; dining car, full-bar on board and comfy beds in which to pass the multiple hours of transport between cities. Our train was not this type. Although it was referred to as "2nd class" it began to feel more like a prison cell. We bought the last two seats on the train which happened to be top bunks right near the service station exit with a door that didn't fully close and rattled wind and hot air all night long. It was also the smoking section. At about 9 pm we had the train attendant lower our bunks into position and crawl into bed only to be rousted a few minutes later by a rude French couple who claimed that we were occupying their bunk. They rudely kicked us to our assigned bunks and we strapped ourselves to the wall with old, withered leather seat belts that served to keep us from falling onto our rude French bunk mates below. I secretly kept wishing that my bunk would collapse in the middle of the night to squish the jerk French lady snoring below me. It wasn't until I lay down that I got the full train experience: jostling, bumping, hissing and rocking, the train was the most unstable and jerky mode of transportation I'd ever been on. The florescent lights stay on blaring all night as the bumpy tracks threaten to toss you at any time. People with babies pace the isles, trying to keep their children happy. Vendors board the train selling chips, sodas, beer and snacks. The "express" train means nothing other than stopping every 15 minutes to let a vendor on or off, or pick up a drunk local for a ride home. I kept telling myself that "this will make the best story" or "stuff like this builds character" but all-in-all, I'm just glad we survived. There were several jolting moments over the course of our 10 hour journey that I was sure the car behind us was going to fall off its attachment to us and go careening into a rice field. It didn't happen, and we arrived to a bus, that took us to a ferry for a sunrise cruise to this island of Koh Tao. It's a lush jungle filled with tropical plants and endless humidity. I thought that I'd acclimated to the heat here, but the South of Thailand has me sweating profusely again. The food is more exciting, the budget accommodations are livable and the tourist industry is booming! I'm having a hard time fully giving myself to the inflated prices and ridiculous tour costs of this area, but I suppose $5 for dinner is still a good deal. Life on an island continues...